Did you hear about the blonde coyote?
Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.

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What do you call a really smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

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Did you hear about the blonde who almost caused a car wreck?
The spare tire in her trunk blew out.

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How can you tell when a FAX had been sent from a blonde?
There is a stamp on it.

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How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.

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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?
They both look good hanging from a tree.

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How does an attorney sleep?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

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How many jokes are there?
Only three. The rest are true stories.

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How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
How many can you afford?

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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

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What happens to a lawyer who jumps out of a plane at 35,000 feet without a parachute?
Who cares?

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of dirt?
The bucket.

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Who don't blind people like to skydive?
It scares the sh!t out of the dog.

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Why doesn't Mexico have a summer Olympic team?
All their best runners, jumpers and swimmers are in USA.

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What do you say when you see your TV floating at night?
Drop it niggar.

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What is difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?
One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.

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Where can you find the best lawyer?
The nearest cemetery.

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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
His partners.

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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
A smart one.

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Did you hear about the terrorists who took a whole courtroom full of lawyers
hostage?
They threatened to release one every hour until their demands where met